I’ve been walking through life blind, desaturating my entire perspective for the sake of feeling something, an unhealthy approach to searching for meaning.
the colors have been there all along, i’ve just shut it all out to give me something to destroy myself about. and now i’m thinking out loud, because the world deserves this more than I do.
a lack of hue is no reason to stop living, to stop pressing on. because it’s always been there, the light refracting with no sense of exhaustion or tire because unlike us it lets nothing get in its way of being all it can be. I wish I could say the same for me. I wish I assumed my own position with ease rather than forcing myself to get out of bed and letting myself fall victim to the voices in my head.
our irises have absorbed so much more beauty than we give them credit for, I think we’ve taken advantage of everything to the point where there’s nothing left to take and we don’t know how to give. and that’s no way to live. but when you don’t know anything different than what you’re accustomed to you’ll find yourself at dead ends, over and over again.
30 years from now I wanna look back and see this chapter of my life as a turning point, as a pivotal part of my evolution into something bigger, something greater than I could’ve ever imagined. and I hope you’re there to see it happen.
30 years from now, I wonder what my life will look like. I can’t settle for anything short of remarkable. the world will hear this and coin it for conceit, but I guess I’ve just never understood how anyone can sell themselves short on such a large scale.
we’ve all got the luxury of witnessing the colors of our lives, changing and rearranging, every single day.
we’re all canvases of missed potential, and for what its worth I think that’s okay, because no matter what you have or haven’t done, you’ve always been beautiful, and you always will be. let me break through the glass house that you’ve locked yourself inside of. let me set you free.

My whole life has been a canvas of missed potential.
A technicolor vision is all I’ve ever known.
I’m a mess of useless overtones.
I am a canvas of missed potential.
A canvas of missed potential.

Hey, it’s me.
I know things have been hard.
Trust me, I’ve been there myself,
And I've been here for you.
I just wish you’d pick up the phone
Cause i know you’re all alone
And you could use the company.
You could use someone to sit with you
When your nights are sleepless.
I never wanting anything bad for you,
Never wished that upon you or anyone else
But somehow i still feel like it’s my fault;
So as the calls decrease, and the messages fade away,
Just know that I tried, always tried to make this work.
So goodbye.
Goodbye forever.